I sometimes think that the only sane way to live is to pretend no one else exists. Only in that way can anything resembling serenity be nurtured. That that is the only place where true strength can be cultivated. I was going to use the word ‘forged’ there, but that seemed too macho. Cultivate is a more feminine word, surely.…
Control. The ultimate illusion. And yet one to which we are all addicted, or at the very least, conditioned. It is the great self-deception of which most of us are guilty. It is a mind game. We are merely toddlers who have learned how to walk straighter and grip tighter. None of this should sound unduly negative or cynical. It…
Getting Comfortable with Chickens and Ignorance Episode 9 of the podcast has a look at what we know and what we understand, and asks if we can reduce our anxiety by getting more comfortable with what we don’t know and what we can’t control. Pets with confusing names feature early on. There is also a trip to the river, a…
Drawing the Line at Madness Episode 8 of the podcast has me taking a good look at madness and placing it in a context of conflict and self-defence. My knowledge of karate and the systematised code of conduct in that world informs the discussion. I find counsel from one of the great fictional madmen – The Joker, and the words…
Patchouli in the Crow’s Nest, or The Search for Cool In episode 6 of the podcast, a trip down memory lane leads to one especially dodgy haircut and some rather nice hats. It also takes in a teenage summer in the USA and a trip to Canada while there. I share some thoughts and further context in response to my…
Merely I’m sorry. I’m just a man. I don’t know what I represent to you or anybody else. I only know who I am and who I’m not, what I’ve done and what I haven’t. I’m not trying to steal air or drink water or take space that was meant for you. I’m not looking for more. Merely enough. I’m…
Am I a Clown or an Idiot, or Both? In episode three of the podcast I revisit some acting low points in my life before embarking on a discussion of clowns and their role in the formation of my acting identity. I argue that there is something clowns can teach us about living more honestly and happily. Along the way,…
As previously mentioned, I have been prepping a podcast off-shoot for The ClearOut, and I am delighted to present the pilot episode here for your listening pleasure. The podcast continues in the vein of the material I have presented here since 2013, but it is going to be a bit looser, a bit more informal, and hopefully an enjoyable way…
There’s no two ways about it. I’m in a spot, and I’m not enjoying it. I am experiencing a moment of paralysis in my life. I find myself afraid to breathe and afraid to move for fear of breaking. My anxiety and dread sit between my shoulders at the top of my spine like an invisible parasite waiting to cut…
My daughter is doing her absolute best to send me to an institution. She revels in breaking my concentration, in pulling my focus, in distracting me in any way she can from whatever task I am feebly trying to complete. Even though she runs the risk of being on the receiving end of an apoplectic outburst on my part, she…
