In this episode, Dara reckons with the endless repetitions and circuits of day-to-day living – how can they be imbued with meaning? Or do we remain passive and wait for meaning to be conferred from outside? And can meaning really be found in the morning cup of coffee, or the daily stroll in the woods?
Giving Value to Invisible Living – Episode 236 Read More »
In this episode, Dara has thoughts on December coming round so quickly and the accompanying temptation to collapse in a heap. Does the festive season differ in any significant way from the rest of the year? Christmas really did used to be something special and genuinely indulgent – but does that still land when the rest of the year seems to involve frequent indulgence too?
In this episode, Dara considers the power of defying expectations. Partly prompted by a conversation with his dementia-affected father, his thoughts are also informed by a New York psychologist who worked with first responders to World Trade Center attacks. Role-reversal can be both destabilising and disarming, but it rarely goes unnoticed, and it often provokes both consternation and resentment.
Flipping the Script and Messing with Expectations – Episode 230 Read More »
In this episode, Dara is wondering who the enemy is. Finding himself symbolically shaking his fist at the clouds, he tries to work out who exactly he was angry with, and why. His wife used Jedi mind powers to flip the script which only stoked his fire further. The two choices available to him were obvious, and one was certainly not going to end well…
The Wisdom of Humanising the Enemy – Episode 225 Read More »
In this episode, Dara picks up a point from last week and wonders if we can simultaneously be and not be our thoughts and emotions. He asks of what use our emotions are to others. Are we just being self-indulgent when we unload on others or is there room for more self-regulation? He also offers a way into better understanding relational estrangements and resentments.
I Am Not my Thoughts and Emotions! Or Maybe That’s All I Am? – Episode 211 Read More »
A hiatus imposed on Dara by life’s steamroller has reminded him how non-performative the podcast continues to be. He reflects on the circumstances that rendered him incapable of recording over the last few weeks and reiterates his conviction that being judiciously transparent is of more use to his listeners, and to him, than jazz hands and soft shoe shuffles.
This Is Not a Performance (It’s My Life!) – Episode 202 Read More »
In this episode, Dara is reflecting on the year that was and acknowledging the tendency many have to do New Year’s accounting. For him it is not only the start of a new year, but also his birthday – another prompt to do a stocktake. 2024 wasn’t kind, and as he looks down the road of 2025 he wonders what tools are going to serve him best.
New Year’s Inventory – Clearing Out the Stockroom! – Episode 188 Read More »
In this episode, Dara shares final thoughts on the US presidential election and speculates that the Democrats still haven’t shaken the patronising habit of belittling those who disagree with them. He argues that if you take this attitude in the world of martial arts, you are setting yourself up to fail – the assumption of superiority is a dangerous flex of ego that can result in complacency and abdicated diligence.
The Humble Art of Reading the Room, or It’s Not All About You! – Episode 181 Read More »
In this episode, Dara considers the elements that contribute to our resentment buckets and shoulder chips. He believes time and the ease of others are two key ingredients in the mix. He confesses to giving voice to some very uncharitable resentfulness around the time he became a father. He also speaks carefully around a significant source of resentment in his marriage.
You Have It So Easy! Resentment, Ease, and Reaching for the Good – Episode 176 Read More »
In this episode, Dara reflects on a weekend spent with an old friend and his resultant fatigue, both psychological and intellectual. It prompts an interrogation of his belief and value systems and whether they are more or less valid than those of his friend’s. He argues that it is healthy, and perhaps even necessary, to have someone you regard challenge you with love.
How Does That Sound? – Testing Opposing Belief Systems – Episode 174 Read More »
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